Friday, November 11, 2005

Eve is one

Happy Birthday Eve!

One day late. :)

She is having her last party tonight... so I'll post the details of all three party nights after that.

Let me just say that she was extremely dainty and clean in her first cake eating adventure. Tom may insist on dark food coloring in her frosting for the second cake tonight.

I know. This is boring. I'm leaving now. Go watch In America or something.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

Eve firsts...

Yes, I know... I said next time I'd discuss more musical old favorites. But... I can't think of any right now.

Eve slept a little better last night than lately, and it was also easier to get her down to begin with. Yay!

She was just the most precious pink Leopard you've ever seen for Halloween. She also managed to snag her first taste of chocolate....

We'd trick-or-treated at Tom's parents, Eve's pediatrician's (his parent's neighbor), Tom's sister's, and Tom's buddy's house, collecting a v. respectable amount of candy. Is it against child labor laws to force your not-quite-one-year-old to do the onerous task of candy collection yet withhold the spoils for yourself? I *wish* we'd had the video camera... because she played her part perfectly. We'd set her in front of the door, put her candy bag at her feet, ring the door bell, and hide. Everyone was greeted by a lone, smiling pink cat, who immediately turned tail and ran for mom :). Too bad we couldn't teach her to say Trick-or-Treat. Ah well, next year.

Once we reached Grandma's, all the other houses were within very short driving or walking distance, so Eve never had to suffer the monotony of a car ride. However, after we took a short dinner break at Grandma's, we headed to the great grandparents, which required a bit of a drive. Eve immediately put her foot down about that, and insisted on some sort of new entertainment. I handed her a wrapped mini Twix. Deep in the back of my mind I chose a candy without nuts... "just in case." but I knew she wouldn't be able to get the wrapper off... it would just be something fun for her to play with.

And it was fun! She didn't make a peep for the rest of the drive. As we pulled up to the great grandparents' house, Tom leaned back to check on Eve. She'd been so quiet he thought she'd fallen asleep. Ha!

"Jenn, I think she is eating it."

"No way." I say, as I get out of the car and open the back door.

"She is eating it!"

I grab the large half of the wrapper, in which most of the candy bar (not already on her face or in her belly) is still residing. She's got cookie and chocolate all over her face, and all over her fingers. She knows the jig is up. Even as I snatch the larger piece from her left hand, with her right she frantically stuffs the other bit of wrapper (and crumbs of chocolate and cookie) into her mouth and activates the jaws of steel. There is a light in her eyes of triumph, but unfortunately for her, she left a corner of the wrapper outside her lips... and a gentle tug disengages the entire thing. She giggles. No matter what I do, she's already had chocolate... I can't take that away from her. It's a struggle to wipe her face and nose, but even more difficult is the task of getting it off her hands... she fists her hands, valiantly trying to spare the vestiges of chocolate left on her palms... but I prevail, and except for a lingering aroma of the forbidden treat, she is clean.

Now, when unsuspecting relatives offer her a bowl of wrapped candy bars, instead of looking vaguely at them, wondering what they're trying to interest her in now, she--with the speed of a mamba--whips out her hands, grabs whatever her fingers land upon, and whisks it to her mouth, desperate for another taste of divine indulgence. But I'm on to her now.

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

Doin' nothin' for the fun of it

Eve's latest trick is Velcro(tm). She wouldn't let us leave her in the nursery at church this Sunday... she was having a grand ol' time, but would check to make sure Tom or I was there ever few minutes. The one time that I moved and she couldn't find me, she started to cry pitifully. This morning, instead of the usual diving out of my arms into Grandma's, she clung and fussed and grabbed my legs when I finally put her on the floor. Made it extra hard to leave this morning. I took her in for Halloween costume portraits on Sunday, and she wouldn't even stay put for that... she kept getting up and coming to me... and no smiles either. I figure it must be because of the walking... she's figuring out how her and I aren't the same... and that I can leave. Poor tyke.

All right... so I tried the Google trick of searching for "Jenne wants", and I really wasn't going to post it... I was just wasting time... but I couldn't resist... here's the first 5 for your reading pleasure.

1. Jenne wants the judge to lift a 1994 consent decree that called for
ongoing court oversight of Broward jails. Because, come on, the Warden should be king!

2. (This is my favorite) Jenne wants to be buried in a big marble filing cabinet. I don't even think I can add anything to that. It's perfect.

3. jenne. :frown: *wants to give a hug, but doesn't because of the illness* This is totally me... gramophone. Can you see I'm beginning to really dig deep here... On the net, Jenne wants very little... or rather, infrequently.

And then I just page and page and page searching for another instance of Jenne wants... rather than... wants... blah blah blah... Jenne.... And I realize I'm totally dumb! I need to put in "Jenne wants" not Jenne wants... duh.

Other interesting things I found in the search... someone sharing my moniker is the "Webmistress of" Hee. And Sheriff Ken Jenne (the guy who has the issue with court oversight) is popping up on every page of search results. And... there's a Senator Ken Jenne... leading me to wonder if the Sheriff has moved on up.

4. (now that I'm searching for "Jenne wants" (with quotes) things are more fun...)Jenne wants to do 9 things. I want to only have 9 things on my list!

Last, but certainly not least...
5. jenne wants to hop in the shower and then get a little frisky.

I suppose that would be more fun than getting back to work. But, since my search for "Jenne must" turned up about a dozen "Jenne must go!" I guess I must...

Friday, October 21, 2005

Music musings

Well, I'd love to make a music recommendation, but I'm not listening to anything new or edgy these days.

Right now, literally at this very moment, I'm listening to Norah Jones, Lonestar. Awesome song. Awesome artist. I actually consider it a great writing album, now that I know every song by heart. It's got a slightly melancholy feel, which is generally perfect for the heroine in distress (assuming you're not writing anything too adventuresome, then I'd recommend you listen elsewhere.)But, you already know about her, I hope. So you don't need to hear about it. I can't even comment on her newer release, 'cause I haven't bought it yet.

Other than that, I spend a lot of time with Alison Krauss's Forget About It. This album is even older than the Norah one, and Alison's career is not new. This is another good writing album for me, I know it by heart, it's got it's own blue streak, and it conjures images of an emotionally injured heroine picking up the pieces and moving on. I hope I don't need to tell you about her either. She usually performs and records with a band, Union Station. Although they are really awesome in concert, the albums with them haven't impressed me, as a whole. I guess I don't like the decidedly country feel, and the occasional non-Alison vocal leads. However, if that sort of thing appeals to you, you should check them out as well. After all, they had a hand in The Soggy Bottom Boys. What do you mean, George Clooney didn't really sing that?!

I've noticed that Rob Thomas, of Matchbox 20 fame, has a new solo album. I'm very interested in this one, and when I eventually get my grubby hands on the thing, I shall tell you all about it, trust me. In the mean time, let me know if you've heard any of the songs, or own the album yourself. I'd love to hear your thoughts.

Maybe next time I'll discuss a few more old favorites. God knows it will be some time before I have enough spare cash to go around risking it on new, possibly mediocre albums.

Friday, October 07, 2005


Even the most silver of clouds have black linings.

My favorite "family" columnist, Megan Cox Gurdon, had her fifth (!!!!...!) child, and is retiring, at least temporarily. Actually, she's the only "family" columnist that I read, so the fact that she's my favorite is probably superfluous.

Anyhoo, when I first began reading her column in 2003, she had a piece every Friday, making the best day of the work week even better. Since she became pregnant with this latest baby, she has pared down to a column every other Friday. And now there will be no more.

I am sad to see her go. Her stories of family adventure remind me of my brothers, and me, in childhood when we coined phrases and terms, and were clever and silly, and innocent and irresponsible. Ah, those were the days.

So, if you're up to it, go check her out. She may not be for everyone.

Thursday, October 06, 2005

More Music

Okay, so... on the music front, I've discovered something truly unique.

Jason Mraz. He's so unique that I find it quite impossible to really describe him. One thing that makes him stand out from other folk/rock guys is that he's actually got a very good voice. This is the kind of good voice I reveled in in Choir in high school... when I would be thinking "Wow, that boy can sing!" which, you know, sounds kind of... well, I don't think most guys want to be known for their singing voice, at least... not when they have nothing else going for them.

I digress. In addition to the quality of his voice (that I have to say shows some sort of formal training--maybe he was a choir boy!), the instrumentation is entirely surprising. There is a point when he is Rapping... and there's a Banjo playing... it's quite striking. Don't let that line scare you. This is not Rap.

Like I said, I have a hard time even articulating what he's like. But, I do recommend him, quite highly. I think it will add flavor to any collection.

So, go check out his Debut album, Waiting for My Rocket to Come, (heh heh) and tell me how you like it. I have yet to really dive in to his newer album, but I'll let you know if it's as striking as his first go 'round when I do.

What would you do-oo-ooh...

for a Klondike bar?

For me, it depends on what else is available.

Anyway. Sorry for the radio silence. Thank you for keeping me in line, X.

So, what's been keeping me away?

Well, not having anything pithy to say, I like to keep my mouth shut. Not to mention, there are certain children in the house who've not been napping. And, work has been extra busy and pressury, so no time there either.

So, soon I expect to be visited, gentle viewers, by Buffy, slayer of the Vampires. Why? Eve bit me--and not on the hand, either. Drew blood, the little stinker. Not well pleased. Tom was quick to call her a creature of the night, and really, I see no evidence to the contrary. Extra pale, doesn't sleep at night... sure, she's little, and she doesn't have a lot of teeth, but how many do you really need?

In other news, Eve is walking! Wow, that's scary. It looks weird too. She's so little! I got video of it... but I'm terrible with video... I can post pictures, but I'm lost with the video camera... maybe someday.

Friday, September 23, 2005

On a somewhat lighter note

Last night I watched the last episode of Buffy. I didn't catch the Buffy thing when it was "live" until the end of season 6. So, since about that time I've been going through the DVD seasons as they've come out. I bought the sets until hitting season 4. Since then I've been loving Netflix. Good thing too, because who would really want to own season 7?

I have lots of problems with the season, but I just want to remind everyone that the nasty ubervamp, all one of him, at the beginning of the season totally kicked Buffy's ass. I mean, she was dog meat. After much labor, she won the day with him... but it still wasn't easy. So, I want to know how that was just completely and totally forgotten when all the slayerettes went down into the hellmouth. I mean... yes, they all became real, honest to goodness slayers, but one ubervamp was a little more than one slayer could chew, way back at the beginning of the season. And now the only reason they didn't win without the crisping of Spike was because there were a lot more ubervamps than slayerettes? Bah.

In other television news. I love Lost. No, the show is not perfect. Really, it's not. There are some wonderfully entertaining places to read about how imperfect it is. This one is great, and so is this one! Thanks to X for that last one. So, we get to have fun making fun of the plot holes, bad hair, and un-lovable "heroes." But, more importantly, it really inspires, in me and my husband at least, meaningless but rousing debate. The show is fun to talk about! In contrast, last night, after we watched Survivor (yawn) and CSI, we didn't have much to say. Except Tom. He's decided that he's had enough of the lack of realism in CSI. Because kids who watch it might want to become forensic scientists because they think they will have jobs like CSI. That is obviously the worst thing that could happen. He has no problem with the lack of realism in Lost. He's got so many facets. ;)

Lost has a lot of the same problems that Season 7 (and 6) of Buffy had. Why am I mad about Buffy and not about Lost? I also have many facets. No, really, it’s because I cared about Buffy. I wanted it to be as great as it once was. Lost on the other hand, I don’t care… it’s just a fun little game, with some lovable characters and some good actors… maybe someday Lost can rise to its potential, but even if it doesn’t, I’ll still be a fan.

Speaking of Buffy. I still haven’t caught an episode of the new “Bones” show with Angel. But I did catch “How I met your mother” with Willow. Totally disappointed that Willow is straight (yay!) but merely, once again, a side-kick (boo). Doogie Houser cracks me up though, so I may watch the show a second time. Before the very last line of the show, I said to Tom, “So… is the show over? We know how he met their mother.”

“Oh yeah…hmmm.”

After the last line, Tom says, “They can’t do that much longer. I wonder what they’re going to do.” We’ll see if they can keep us interested.

I hope that’s enough TV for you. Now get back to work.

Finding it...

So, there's been some soul-searching going on in a friend's life. I don't think she'll mind you knowing who she is (since I think the three people who read this blog read her blog too). It's Dee.

Her ruminations, and the struggles I'm having in my own life have me thinking.

I'm not a humble person. Really, I loathe the know-it-allness, and center-of-the-worldness that is me. But, that's who I am. Chalk it up to being practically perfect in every way and being the oldest and only daughter of an adoring mother. Maybe I've fooled some of you, but I think you've all had a brush with the I-can-do-anything and I-have-all-the-answers me.

So, not surprisingly, I've known my whole life that I'm destined for something big. The effervescent thought of grandeur floated in my head for all of my youth before solidifying in the Fall (or the fall) of 2001. What was I doing with my life? I wanted to stand up and mean something in the world, share me with those who needed... me.

I wanted to do something practical... ha ha, as far as I got was giving blood in October. Papa talked me out of joining the military. Money talked me out of going to school to become a nurse. I continued to labor in my non-world-changing computer programming job. I felt I had no skills to volunteer for anything valuable.

In December I found a new way to procrastinate at work, and began several long months where kind accolades for my amateur writing had me envisioning my name on hard-bound spines lined up in bookcases across the country. But I'd start with a smaller dream, my name on paper spines in the Romance section at Barnes and Noble. Chuh. I still harbor a small hope that life will someday combine inspiration and with time and ability, and I'll at least be able to finish writing a book, even if it never shows up in Mass-market paperback.

My enthusiasm for greatness began to wane, until an opportunity for volunteer work arose in 2003. I think that might be my moment of humanitarian greatness. It was 2 weeks.

About the same time my heart told me it was time for a baby, even if my husband told me it wasn't. Ever since that time, it seems, he and I have been at odds. Biology won the day, and today I have a beautiful 10 month old. And now I've realized something.

I was destined for great things. And this is it. I have found great satisfaction in being Eve's mom. I don't feel like I'm searching any longer to find what it is I should do with my life. And I don't feel like I've lost my freedom to pursue greatness. Greatness is upon me.

I am far from satisfied with my life, as it is far from perfect. But I am satisfied with my role as wife and mother. Before I became pregnant, I would never have believed I would say something like this, but I've come to realize that motherhood is the highest calling. It requires sacrifice and dedication to the nth degree, and even at 10 months, it's more rewarding than anything else I've ever pursued or accomplished.

I've found it.

I have good friends

What would I do without you? I was down, and you lifted me up. I appreciate it.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005


So, yesterday I was on top of the world. Well, I should qualify that. I was on top of the world about being able to help others. The rest of life is rather less than topish, but I was going to be working with The Mobility Project again!

Sure, I wasn't going to be going anywhere, but I was helping. I was going to help refurbish wheel chairs which would then be going with a local group to Houston to help displaced Katrina victims who needed mobility. Usually this group doesn't work within the United States because there is so much federal and personal wealth. However, as we all know, Katrina created so much need, that they decided to accept an invitation to Houston. I was also going to send with them 10 homemade baby carrier wraps-- donated by the local NINO group I lead--to be distributed to needy moms who could really use a hands-free way to carry their babies.

Even yesterday my elation began to wane. First off, the VP of the organization called me to tell me to wear makeup, TV cameras and a Seattle Times reporter would be there. Bleh. Then, after having arrived about 20 minutes later than I hoped to (the makeup application) I was told by the VP's husband that there really wasn't much left to do... but be on TV. They had stepped up the effort Sunday, and had over 100 chairs to pack for shipment to Houston. So I felt pretty useless. With Eve strapped to my back, I didn't have the capability of just doing whatever, and had been hoping for a job that would fit with my back-baby. So, all-in-all, I managed to help screw into place a single wheel-chair seat. I think I was more in the way, but the TV crew wanted to record some working... and most the real workers had left. Then, I helped move about 10 wheel chairs that needed to be packed up and shipped back to the warehouse where they would await refurbishing another day. Oh, and I helped another lady remove a bolt from another wheel-chair part. Woo hoo! Oh well...I consoled myself that the baby wraps were a worthy contribution, even if I hadn't been needed for the chairs.

I came down a bit more when Tom decided we wouldn't go out to dinner with the crew... great people who I haven't gotten to spend much time with since I returned from Afghanistan over 2 years ago... I miss them, and dinner would have been an awesome time!

Oh well. Still, a good thing that I was a small part of was going to happen for my countrymen. Plus, maybe Eve would have her television debut in the evening news. ;)

However, today the VP sent out an email to let us all know the trip has been canceled due to Hurricane Rita.

*Shrug* what can you do about the weather? I feel small for being disappointed. So... no chair delivery, no wrap distribution... no news segment! Combine this disappointment with what the rest of my life is handing to me these days, and you've got a recipe for a nice little pity party that could carry me through the week. However, as the only adult in my household, I am not afforded the luxury of pity parties... so I must buck up and smile and figure out what to do about the baby wraps.

Friday, September 16, 2005

You know...

I've been meaning to make a music recommendation.

Get yourself a copy of the Fountains of Wayne album, Welcome Interstate Managers.

Yes, this is the Fountains of Wayne that is responsible for Stacy's Mom. Hee. But the whole album is quite brilliant. It's got a Fall sort of feeling to it, catchy, singable tunes, but not too sunny. On the other hand, not too heavy either. My favorite aspect of their songs is the feeling that you're listening to the real them. Unlike some posing groups out there, they write songs about the work-a-day world the rest of us live in, rather than making up a life they never had.

Mexican Wine is great, Valley Wintersong is cozy, and Haley's Waitress is soooo exactly what we've all experienced. :) Every song is awesome. There's not a bad apple in the bunch.

When your done with that and ready to change gears, move on to something a little angsty sounding, but still totally beautiful.

Evanescence's Fallen album.

X turned me on to this band quite some time ago. She said, and I agree, that a few of the songs are perfect Vampire romance songs. I have to agree that "Bring me to Life" would be much more appropriate in Underworld than in Daredevil *gag*.

This has eclipsed my tired old Jagged Little Pill as the album of choice for when I'm feeling fighty with Tom and can't actually have a fight with him. LOL.

Plus, it's just gorgeous music. To look at the lead vocalist, you would not believe the powerhouse she is. And her voice is the perfect counterpoint to the dark lyrics and harsh edge in the instrumentals.

Okay, I'm done. Enjoy!

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Nothing very clever

That's right. I'm just posting to pass the time. I've nothing particular to share. How about a peek into my night's sleep? Sound exciting? I though you'd be interested.

Eve fell asleep accidentally around 8. I say accidentally, because I hadn't really anticipated it, nor had I hoped for it. 9 is her usual bed time. Needless to say, she felt like more of a nap than a long night's sleep. She woke as soon as we tried to move her to her bed. I spent another half hour purposefully putting her to sleep. She slept fitfully for a little over 2 hours... just after I went to bed. It took until midnight to get her back to sleep. I think after that she slept until 3, though I didn't actually check the clock. I spent the rest of the night on the rocking chair with her in my lap. I woke up at 5:30 to find her asleep, and put her back in her bed to return to mine. about 10 minutes later she was up again, crying. I sat in the rocker until she fell asleep again, but she woke as soon as I tried to move her. I heard Tom's alarm go off, so I brought her into our bed to try to get a bit more sleep. No. She was awake and thrilled to be with us. I never got anymore sleep. Blah.

I think this explains why I don't have much to say today. :)

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

When it rains it pours

Gosh I'm talkative today, aren't I?

So, in addition to my snail's pace progress to work today, I noticed another thing. School busses really mess with my schedule. That, along with the "This is my arterial road and I'll set the speed limit" vigilantes have turned my short cut into a loooong, sloooow, scenic route. I think I'll have to go back to the freeway.

But, if I do that, then I'll miss the interesting sights. Like this morning. I'm not sure who exactly I saw waiting at the end of a long shared driveway for a school bus today. She was dressed in one of those tissue skirts... with the hem dipping down to several points, a long shirt with a thin, tiny tied-in-front long-sleeved shrug. Her hair was stick straight, and her make-up was done for a night out. Then I noticed the baby in her arms. Was she a high school student or a mom with a school-aged child? I was so confused! Who has time, energy or inclination to look like that with children? And... if she's a student, how sad!

What would I blog about if I take the highway to work? ;)

29 Pines, or... hell?

The camping trip I spoke of a few weeks ago. It came and went, and was truly as awful (at least) as I thought it would be. I'm never returning to that place. I got stung by yellow jackets, Tom got stung by yellow jackets, and Eve barely escaped. There were no hookups, no running water. Ugh. I am a neurotic hand washer. Not having a place to wash my hands for at least 20 seconds with soap and hot water is near torture for me. I can sacrifice for a good cause, but I don't consider it recreation if I can't wash my darn hands!!

Trying to focus on the positive, I *did* get to see quite a few shooting stars on the drive there, and I got to sleep with Eve, rather than having to get up every few hours to feed or cuddle her. So, I actually slept better than I do at home!

Also, I got to practice my rock stacking, which I find relaxing and rewarding. I can't remember where or when I saw my first rock stack, but I was imediately intrigued. So I decided to try it. I didn't learn from anyone, I just sort of figured it out on my own. My MIL (bless her heart) tells me a dear friend of hers thinks it's satanic (!?!?), but I feel it is an amazing testament to God. He made each stone, and created the forces that allow them to be balanced in a seemingly precarious way atop one another. It's really cool that way.

We took pictures of the two big ones I made. All the others got knocked over rather quickly by my 3 year old nephew. Oh well, such things are temporary, and the fun is more in the creating than in the creation. Maybe I'll get around someday to putting the pictures up somewhere. I'm sure it will be in combination with some adorable Eve pictures. :)

Thank you

You know who you are. You, in your gray-green Honda minivan. You single-handedly kept me and 20 other drivers from making it to work a few worthless minutes early. You kept us from even approaching the speed limit. You were on a crusade to keep everyone at a horse and buggy speed. You saved us precious gas when it is costing so much. I salute you. I'm also quite pleased that you didn't choose to get coffee when I get coffee, because I'm sure you would have ordered half a dozen drinks, and I would have been actually *late* for work. Thank you!

Friday, August 26, 2005

In-Laws, Mud holes, and 30 second tents

That's right ladies and gentlemen, Eve, Tom and I will be camping this weekend. I'm thrilled.

I mean, who wouldn't be excited to be leaving their lovely house on the lake, and a rare-working boat, for a muddy creek and electricity-free cow-pasture camping with one's in-laws?

Me! Me! I think the amenities of this "camp ground" also include non-flushing "toilets" and a delightful absence of showers.

I had better accommodations in Afghanistan.

Picture the Air force pilot in the alien suit with a fag perched between his lips and his head in his hands. "This is not happening, this is not happening." Instead, I say, "I have a wonderful life, I have a wonderful life..."

This is not The Greatest Song in the World, no.
This is just a tribute.

You might think that's a non sequitur, but the big red demony alien thingy is the tie in. Natch.

Okay, okay. I'm done. I actually have more to say, lots, but I also have work to do.

Enjoy your non-crappy-camping weekends all, and I'll see you next week.

It's a Wonderful Life

"You hav a Vunderful life, Geneefer, yes?" Thus proclaims my Russian sister-in-law.

We had just returned from a spin around the lake in our perennially broken boat, which is having a rare bout of fixedness, just in time for us to miss a nice hot weekend at home, I might add.

She has a high-needs baby a month older than the lovely Eve. His name is Daniel, or Danika, or Danushka, or Danny. She is a very attentive mother, but Danny demands more, and no car seat either, please. I had already decided I had a wonderful life before she announced it. Eve could not be a better natured child, and Tom could hardly be a more idyllic father. I must remind myself of the wonder of my life often, but I am truly wonderfully blessed.

I hope the same for her someday. Right now, she must parent this difficult child almost all on her own, with her own mother about as far away as could possibly be, a husband who can not communicate with her in her own language, and an apartment in a landlocked town near Denver that could not be more unlike her bayside city in Russia. Her best friend in the states is a Ukrainian woman, who's parenting has led to an 8 year old who drinks beer--the friend begs her daughter not to do this, but who can control an 8 year old? I'm sorry, but WTH?! No wonder Russia is in such a decline. Okay, the Ukraine. Anastasia is scandalized, but I get the feeling that she thinks the same could happen to her--Daniel is the one in control. *Shudder*

I hope my brother becomes more involved before the childhood drinking begins. And I hope he gets a job with a future so that Anastasia can feel secure, and can visit her mom more regularly.

Three cheers for the land of the free, the "sensitive man" movement, and miraculously good babies!

Spiders and me

I am not new to spider stories. No. There's the sweatshirt spider story, the bathroom spider story, the training spider story, and I even have a Mexico spider story, which is less funny because the spider*s* were actually evil, and muy numerous. Today there is another for the spider archives.

A Tale of Two Spiders, or, The Laundry Spider and the Bathroom Spider, the second.

I think it's been a month since I folded laundry. Seriously. Or at least, it's been a month that I've had a rotating pile (several full baskets) of clean, unfolded laundry. It appears that spiders think this is cool digs for them. Worthless cat. So... this morning I walk out to grab a towel, my husband is sitting with the laptop across the room.

"Ack." (deadpan, I'm tired)
Beat. Beat. Beat.
"What?" Tom asks without feeling. He's tired and he's reading his Mac news.
I stand there, looking at him, looking at the wall, looking at him.
He finally looks up. "What?"
"Spider." Duh.
I direct my gaze to the spindly brown thing on the wall.
"Oh. That's nothing."
Chuh. "But you're going to kill it anyway. Right?"
The spider, meanwhile, listens in pleased hunger. Knowing the large, stupid one has been convinced by its spindly nature into thinking it harmless, while it licks its chops in anticipation of a bite of live flesh. It probably left spider drool on my clothes. Ew.
Later, after my shower I'm attacked in the bathroom... this time it was an aerial attack, and the spider was small and black. Clearly there is a plague going on in my house. I let out two short squeals, which Tom later tells me sounded like a small, annoying canine, before managing to wrest the spider to the ground. Being barefoot, I must scramble for a large handful of toilet paper with witch to smash the offending creature into an unrecognizable pulp.
"Uh... are you okay?" through the door, apprehensively as if I might come flying from the room and bonk his head or something.
What does he mean 'am I okay?' I've just been assaulted in my own bathroom. And I probably woke the baby, which always makes morning toiletries more hectic. Of course I'm not okay.
"Fine. Just been attacked by a spider is all."
"Oh." Just that.
Back in the living room, Tom is now dressed, but he is otherwise situated just as he was before, laptop and all. Now it is 'the week in pictures' or some such. The spider is still on the wall. And still very much alive.
"Why haven't you killed it?"
"I like him. He entertains me."
"like my barking?"
"yes, like that."
"kill it."
He sighs. "Very well."
I come back a few moments later to find the spider gone.
"Did you kill it?"
"Yes." Duh.
I am still skeptical, and shall not be surprised to find the fiendish devil among the clothes tonight as I dig through them for the weekend's necessities.
Clearly, my husband doesn't understand.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

You get to share

Completely randomly I wonder if hitting your toe with a hammer is the true way to get rid toe nail fungus. Not that I have a practical reason to care. I don't have toe nail fungus, I do have a toe nail fungus medication ad on my screen right now though, and I'm thinking my way is cheaper and faster. Remember when you were a kid and you slammed your finger in the car door? The nail got black, fell off, et voila, you have a brand new nail!

I appologize. Get back to work.

All the news you need to know

Bah. There's too much going on. But... I learned a new skill this week, and I'm *sooo* overly proud of myself.

I learned to embroider! It's so easy and rewarding! Someday I'll share pictures... when I download them... because of course I *took* pictures! I'm never buying an expensive baby gift again. It's all about clever onesies now baby! And if you have a home, you will be getting towels or something... sorry... I must share my art. ;)

Friday, August 12, 2005

Just call me Jersey Jenn

Yes, I base my feelings of accomplishment at the end of the work day on how much milk I've pumped. This must be how cows feel.

Monday, July 11, 2005

Why did I do this...

you may ask. Well, mainly so I could comment on other blog entries by other bloggers without having to enter who I am every time. So, Laziness is the answer to your question.